Boy 1: "We should just sit around and eat all day."
Boy 2: "I will not do that. That is against the Ten Commandments of my life."
Boy 1: "Ms. C, he looks like a girl."
Boy 2: "I always look like a girl, honey."
Girl: "I have a prayer request. I'm ill."
Girl: "Not, you know, the regular kind of ill. The other kind."
Girl: "You know, the other kind of ill. You know. Lovesick!"
Girl: "Did you get a haircut? It's so cute!"
Boy: "No, I just showered."
Girl: "Hi, Miss C."
Me: "Hi, Miss (Name)."
Girl: "I'm not a miss yet!"
Me: "You're always a miss."
Girl: "Well, you're more miss-y."
Test Question: Name three major characters in Judges. What are they known for?
Girl: "Ehud was a very epic leftie who killed a very fat king."
After I scolded a student for making the world's most obnoxious (and continuous) noise
"Unfair! You won't let me woodpeck!"
At English camp, when I told two of my boys to join me at the Shrinky-Dink workshop
Boy 1: "Yay! Shrinky-Dinks!"
Boy 2: (crestfallen) "Oh, there's no food in here?"
Card drawn from a board game based on actual events from Joshua
"Evil unicorns attack your house! Go back three spaces."
Boy, in reference to The True Confessions of Charlotte Doyle: "What's that book about the girl in the ship? Sarah Palin?"
Boy: "Ms. C, why doesn't this school have Slushies?!"
Girl: "Ms. C, did you ever have crushes?"
Me: "Well, sure, most people have crushes at some point."
Girl: "I bet you dumped 'em all, huh?"
Me: "The thing about crushes is that most of them are kinda secret. Most of my crushes never knew they were crushes at all."
Girl: "Oh...do you have a crush now?"
Me: "Nope, no crushes."
Girl: (quite sympathetically) "Well, that's okay, Ms. C."
Girl, after learning my age: "28? That's young for someone so tall!"